Creepy Stalker

The internet freaks me out. I get complacent. I think we all do. We point, click, drag, and spew around like we own the joint. Most of the time, all is well. But, occasionally, it will knock you on your butt.

My dad died last August. It's been 8 months and I am still adjusting. I might always be.

We weren't especially close, but he was my only family. Losing him was more than just losing him. The roots are gone. Sometimes, being untethered is exhilarating. Sometimes, out of the blue, it makes me feel so small.

Like yesterday.

I was checking my Yahoo mail when I noticed the column to my right had my dad's name listed. It was asking if I wanted updates from him. Do I want updates from my dad? Absolutely! I want to know what it's like being dead. If he knows what happened to mom. If he sees her. If she knows his secrets. If he knows mine. Yes, Yahoo, I want updates. I cliked the yes button.

It said there were no new updates.